The 2025 Steve Awards for worst Mother's Day marketing

This week marks six years since I published a post on The Spinoff about a Mother’s Day marketing titled ‘A leaked transcript from the Farmers Mother’s Day catalogue planning meeting’.

Since then, I’ve had the immeasurable joy of having people yell out SHAVE HER, WEIGH HER, BRUSH HER TEETH at me in bars, at events, and even once in a supermarket. Every year since, readers of the Emily Writes Weekly have sent me diabolical Mother’s Day marketing. Together, we have had an annual ‘Steve Awards’ for appalling Mother’s Day marketing.

Today I present to you the best of the worst of 2025 Mother’s Day. I’ll leave it to you to crown your own winner.

Steve from JB Hi-Fi

Steve please. It would not make a mum’s day to get a portable blender. She can buy a portable blender herself. And you know what? I bought a BlendJet portable blender and they recalled it and then never replaced it and I sent like 8000 emails and eventually I used AI (boooo!) and said ‘write me a letter like I’m a lawyer and I’m going to sue BlendJet if they don’t send me a new portable blender’. And it did. And what do you know, two days later they said I could have a new portable blender. And look, I haven’t even used it.

Steve from Hell Pizza

I was sent this one so many times. I think of the marketing team at Hell Pizza as being like seven Steves but they spell Steven ‘Stephfen’ and they say things like ‘What if we gave away condoms how insane and crazy and wild and risque would that be!’ and then the other Steves would be like ‘People will get so angry it will be insane! We are so edgy! Nobody does marketing like us!’ and then they do it and you’re like ‘I got a condom with my pizza? Fine. Whatever.’

And then Stephfen’s ad agency gets paid $170,000.

Do not give your mum a free door hanger.

Oh hold on…what’s this? Dessert for mum? I take it all back.

Steve from Delonghi

I get it. You sell toasters. So you want to sell toasters. But no mum wants a toaster for Mother’s Day. Make mum breakfast and bed (and the toaster is just in the image) would have been better.

NO KITCHEN APPLIANCES AS PRESENTS. How many times do we have to tell you? The only thing worse is a razor.

Steve from Vanish New Zealand

See this is the toaster conundrum again right? You sell laundry powder. You want people to buy laundry powder. So you think you’re stuck.

Vanish tried to avoid a Steve Award by having a Mother’s Day Giveaway. They get half a point for this. Because half a point has to be taken off because you’re still implying a mother wants washing powder for Mother’s Day. Or worse, carpet cleaner.

Why not have a Mother’s Day prize that she actually wants that doesn’t include - what is that? Is that a toilet perfume? Just don’t have your products as part of it. You can go in the draw by buying a product. That’s not hard is it?

Steve from Wiper Tech

Be mum’s hero? BE MUM’S HERO? Steve, Steve you are killing me. You are killing me. No mother wants wipers. I don’t even…do you need to replace your wipers? What is this? And is that meant to be a mum and dad? Why are they dressed the same? Or is he from Wiper Tech? That makes it even weirder if she’s wearing the same outfit as the staff at Wiper Tech.

Steve from Ring

For the mum who does it all? If she does it all? Don’t you think you should be getting her a better present than a ring camera? If she does it all shouldn’t you be taking care of her ring rather than getting another ring?

What is the purpose of this nonsense. Help her welcome guests? What on Earth is this? If YOU want a ring thing then YOU should buy one. But do not ever give one as a Mother’s Day present unless she specifically says she wants a ring - and then you absolutely MUST get clarification that she doesn’t want a beautiful ring she wants whatever this is.

Steve from Chemist Warehouse

So, the marketing team at Chemist Warehouse must be just one Steve and he’s also a chemist there and he also works the till and he also cleans and he also orders stock. Because what on EARTH is going on with their marketing.

It’s like someone said ‘Steve, Mother’s Day is coming up - are we doing anything?’ and he said ‘Just send out the mailer but put pink hearts on it because women love hearts and then put two kids on it and then put ‘Give mum the gift of health this Mother’s Day’. And then they said ‘really? You’re not going to choose appropriate products for this mailer?’ and he went….Ummm put in an Optislim weight management pack at the top. What else do women love? Oh I know tampons and pads. Obviously a razor because they are hairy - but inexplicably make sure it’s a razor for men. Oh and an HIV self test. Done’.

Steve from Money Compare

What mum would want car insurance for Mother’s Day? Unless you’re buying her a car. This is just not a good choice. Mum deserves better. No really, read your own ad. She deserves better.

Steve from I don’t even know honestly

Why is there American spelling if it is a company in New Zealand? I know that’s the least of our problems here but I’m pointing it out anyway. What even is this? Are they saying mums can’t balance household bills? Are they saying you should balance them for your mum? I am so confused.

Steve from Woolworths

Do not give your mother tomatoes for Mother’s Day unless she said said “please give me tomatoes for Mother’s Day”. If she said that - then this is actually the perfect Mother’s Day gift for her.

So which is the worst? Well, if it were up to me instead of you - I’d give the coalition Government the Steve Award because today they’re all going to shit on about how much they care about mums. And it’s a lie.

Mothers, on average, experience a 4.4 percent decrease in hourly wages upon returning to work. Mothers who take longer than 12 months to return to paid work experience an 8.3 percent decrease in hourly earnings regardless of previous employment, education, and earnings.

Women often ‘trade-off’ wages and career progression for flexibility in working hours. Of all women in the paid workforce, nearly one in three women work part-time, less than 30 hours per week. Women are more likely to be in casual work and in multiple jobs, which are typically low-paid.

This week, the Government killed all pay equity claims and made it nearly impossible for pay equity claims to be successful. This gift will be felt for generations.

HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY!

What I think would be an actually good gift is a subscription to this here newsletter for laughs and community. But I suppose I would say that! You can also buy my books here: Needs Adult Supervision, Is It Bedtime Yet? and Rants in the Dark.